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So, Igot to thinking about what Liv said about writing my feelings down.My very first thought was that Dad wouldn't like that at all. Feelingsweren't his thing. Mom had them, but Dad was action and nothing else.Whenever I did something wrong meaning not the way he would do it he'dyell "Think, Timothy, think!" Actually, the way I remember it was"Thenk, Timothy, thenk!" He seemed to always draw out his commands. Butif I ever did try to stop and figure something out he'd yell "come onhero we don't have all day." He was always in a hurry and I was alwaystoo slow.To speed things up he hit me. I don't mean punched me, and he onlyslapped me in the face one time. I was so little I don't remember whatit was for. I just remember he apologized to me for it. I guess that'swhy I remember it at all. It's the only time I can remember him everapologizing to anybody for anything. He did slap me in the back of thehead though, a lot. And boy did he use the belt. He took everything Idid or didn't do. I eased her back to a lope, and headed her toward the fence, guiding her to run parallel to it, and we made a circuit of the pasture. I eased her back to a walk, and we did another circuit for her to cool down. I hate trotting, so I was glad she followed my touches, and understood what I wanted her to do. I rode her back to the gate and dismounted. She stood quiet while I opened the gate, and very calmly followed me as I led her through the gate. She stood quietly as I closed the gate.Dad was waiting, smiling like I hadn’t seen before. “She isn’t registered, so you can name her.” He told me.“Her name is Star,” I said.I was about to ask how we were getting her home, when I saw the new, two-horse trailer hitched to the pickup. The door was open and the ramp was down, so I led her over to the trailer. I clipped a rope lead on her halter, tied the rope to a ring on the side of the trailer, and took off her bridle. I unfastened the girths, and slung the saddle over my shoulder. I carried.
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